Self Love

You Are Loved | Most Sincerely

Yes, you Are, Loved, Most Sincerely.  Even if you don’t love yourself, Yet.  When you can love yourself, will you truly feel the love of others around you.

Its been a kind of tough week.

Two people, I didn’t know, but knew Of, passed away.

One from a long fought battle,  with cancer, and the other from another long fought battle, with depression.

Both way too young to die.

I saw amazing tributes to both of them.  They were both courageous, funny, talented men.

One knew it, he shared value and loved life,  and one like many of us didn’t realise his greatness.

Then I see a friend comment that ‘people don’t give a damn’.. something I have to disagree with.

I know where they’re coming from. It would seem that way sometimes. However I know it not to be the case.

I’ve been through losses, divorce, bereavement and I’ve had people cross the road, rather than say ‘Im so sorry’… i’ve also had people go and look out the window, rather than say ‘Im so sorry’.

I’ve had people send me texts, rather than actually knock on the door and give me that hug.

I’ve also been through depression, when I was young and then older too. Mine is/was ‘reactive’,( ie I react to things. A relationship break up, my marriage break up and then my fur baby dying)

I’ve been bullied and curled up on my bed, with anxiety, and a friend drop by at 7.30 with chocolates and a movie.

I don’t share all this, for your pity, I share it to show you, Im not talking hot air.

I remember meeting an acquaintance many years ago. A mutual acquaintance was dying. I asked them

‘have you been to see them’?
‘No’ they responded – however they would go to the funeral. WTF

This wasn’t because they didn’t give a damn. They just didn’t know how to handle going to see someone who was about to die.

One of the men I talked about earlier on,  shared value regularly. He even did this in the last month before he died. He looked dreadful and it was so hard to watch. However he did it, because he cared more about the value he was sharing than what he looked like.

He wanted to help people right until the end.I know people care, they just don’t know how to show it sometimes.

I lost my fur  baby, about four years ago now. I was absolutely devastated. Someone said to me ‘what do you miss most’ I said after a little thought ‘unconditional love’… then give that to yourself, they said.

Thats what we are ALL missing. That unconditional love for ourselves.

When you love yourself, you are much more able to reach out to others, give compliments, give hugs. Not take things personally.

So know that people do care. They just don’t know how to show it sometimes. People are unable to get over themselves, see that its not about ‘them’ its about the person who is suffering.

How about you start caring for yourself.

Work On You.
I’ve been working on me for years. I grew up, very timid, low self esteem. Wouldn’t say boo to a ghost. In fact, I found it hilarious later in life. People would say ‘Helen, you’re so aloof’

I wasn’t ‘Aloof’ at all, I was painfully shy and would at all costs, avoid eye contact.

However, since starting to work on me, everything has changed.

Someone said recently to me,

‘I Love your Lives, its as if your my mother telling me what I wish she’d said to me’

and thats just it. We have to give our Inner child the love, the encouragement, the support, that perhaps we were not given when we were young. Our parents, were doing the best they could with what they had…

My lives are on my Facebook page, Ill start doing them at a certain time so you can catch me !!

 

this was me about 12 maybe older, trying Sooo hard 🙂

I know its not easy, you have to give yourself time out. Half an hour to read a book, or down at the beach, or take yourself on a date.

Be Good to You. Talk Kindly  to yourself, Tell Yourself Amazing you are.

I found this some time ago, I’ll share again here.

I am Enough
I am Worthy
I am Valuable
I am Beautiful
I am Powerful

Turn off the news, you can’t change anything thats happened. Decide to do something yourself to make a difference.

Go hug that person, send a card, whatever feels right for you !!

In fact, go look up the Good News Network. 

I refuse to watch the news, I’ll give to charity and Ill buy a homeless man a drink and some food. I won’t gossip and Ill give praise and constructive feedback when needed.

I focus on the good. When I do get down, and yes, we all do. I focus on what I have to be grateful for.

A Nice warm bed.
A Hot shower
Money in my pocket.
I know its not as easy as that.

When I lost my fur baby, I started to go down a really bad dark hole. She had been there for me through everything. Without her, everything came up to the surface, and it was like a torrent that I couldn’t handle.

As a last resort, I went to the doctor and said ‘Give me tablets’. I took those tablets for One day, they made me feel so bad. Even thought friends and the doctor said ‘You’ll feel worse before you feel better, I was not willing to feel even worse’ .. Each to their own, if they work for you, then thats fine, they are just not my ‘bag’.

I decided I would do it myself. So I took myself out in nature, focussing on gratitude, I journaled. I did everything I didn’t want to do. I MADE myself go out and see friends.

I have been through some of the SH***** times, believe me. However, I have gotten myself out to them and Im stronger and wiser for it.

I work on Me Continually.  I take myself to the beach, I write, I work on gratitude. I give love to others.

Remember You’ve got this and remember, a wonderful quote from Winnie the Pooh.

Oh and before I go, let me share with you, something wonderful someone did for me. Tessa, had just lost her husband, however she reached out to me when I’d lost my fur baby and shared something wonderful with me

Send 7 cards over 7 days to 7 people telling them how much they mean to you.
It worked, I felt so good at the end of it.

So Remember You Are Loved, With Sincerity.

Helen
If you know anyone who is going through a tough time, this website, I have been told by someone who really struggled, the best they’ve seen.

Looking for coaching? Then Pm me on Facebook or fill out the form and join my newsletter/ask me about coaching

 

Self Love

Whats Wrong With Me? | Absolutely Nothing

So  in answer to that question, Whats Wrong With Me?, Absolutely Nothing.  There is Absolutely  Nothing wrong with you.

However, in the spirit of full and brutal honesty – I have thought it myself.

I have been single for ‘years’ and I mean ‘years’…

However, back to you – thinking ‘whats wrong with me’ will keep any Mr or Mrs Right away from you, I can promise you. Whatever questions you are yourself, you Will get answers.

So instead keep asking ‘Whats Right with me’ and you’ll keep getting great answers.

Whats Wrong with me

Having found several gorgeous men and having had partners on and off since I was about 20.. until the age of 42. My ex husband and longest term partner, was a, lovely lovely man and still is, he just wasn’t right for me.  I then fell for what I thought was ‘the grass was greener’ someone who ‘seemed’ the epitome of a gentlemen, who turned out to be a Sheep in wolfs clothing.

My heart was truly trampled on, and I can tell you a various stages in this time I really did think ‘whats wrong with me’..

I tried all sorts of dating, Table for six, Speed dating, Internet dating, you name it.

Once again I met some lovely men, and some not so lovely men. The one who sat there with ONE seat and let me go off and get my own!! Or the one who after I bought the first round, we just sat there with no drinks in front of us, as the waitress cleared our empty glasses.  Now to be kind to men, I realise its not always easy meeting someone for the first time, but seriously how hard is it to Buy a drink?

After these various attempts at dating – I have given it all a Wide birth for the last several years. I have instead worked on me!! and I can categorically say now I Love me. Not in the arragant sense of the word. However, people would definitely call me ‘confident’ these days. Thats not to say that I think every man is going to fall at my feet. Not at all.  Well the fact that they haven’t tells me that.. Gulp.

Believe In Yourself and The World Will too

However, I also know that the one constant in all this, is ME. So whilst I don’t blame myself.. I do sometimes think ‘whats wrong with me’. But this is where my better half aka my better self steps up and says ‘Hey Helen, how about Whats right with me’…

I know whats right with me. I’m kind, warm caring, loving, sensitive, strong, independent.. I could go on, but I won’t. Because at the end of the day – I know I have plenty thats right with me.

I shared this live on Facebook – you can check it out here,

Being confident about yourself, accepting your attributes and knowing  that none of us are perfect, , will absolutely put you in the absolutely best frame of mind to attract that Mr Right, or Mrs.

So how do you find your Mr or Mrs Right

Join Clubs, think of the hobbies you have and go out there and join the clubs.
At the gym, walking, at the cinema.
Start conversations. I read somewhere the other day, how a lady met her husband simply by asking him ‘whats the time please’.

If you haven’t, do try all the ones I’ve mentioned above. Speed dating, internet dating, dinner dates ie Table for 6 or 12 or whatever they offer.

He or She is out there and the more you actually Enjoy Life.. ie just be yourself, get out there, Love and accept yourself. You will meet him or Her… when you least expect  it..

So in the meantime, work on you.  Start Loving you, accentuate your positives,
Accept You are You, wonderful, Strong and Amazing
Wear what you love, what makes you comfortable, whatever makes YOU feel 100 Bucks or even a Million. For me its a bit of lippy, mascara and perfume…

 

Keep me posted, and Ill do the same about me!!

 

With Love

 

Helen

About Helen aka Be Deliciously Free

Self Love

I am Enough | I am EnoughI came across this video yesterday on Facebook, I am Enough, You are Enough by Marisa Peer…

Its very powerful..I have discovered in just how much we ALL need to realise We Are Enough.

I am Enough, You are Enough

 

How important self talk is, what we tell ourselves,  we believe, or even the way others have spoken to you. So much truth in this, its something I feel Sooo passionate about – as I felt so much of my life feeling I wasn’t enough.  I know so many other beautiful people out there – who feel this…

We tend to say to ourselves ‘oh Im so stupid’ and the little child in us (sub conscious mind) believes that. We say these things in a joke, do not joke about it.  We think its funny or arragant to think or believe we are amazing, its totally fine to say I AM AMAZING 🙂

We are Enough – You Absolutely Are Enough – I am Enough

I could totally relate to what she was saying here, all we want is Love, Valididation, Praise, knowing we are enough. So tell yourself…

Go Write on your Wall
I  am Enough – You are
Enough.
Write it on your Mirror – I am Amazing, I am Powerful, whatever works for you. I have on my bathroom Mirror “I am Amazing

Record on your phone, Shout it from the Roof tops.  You know, as Marisa says at one point in her talk, magazines and everywhere are constantly telling us, we are Not Enough.. not Slim enough, Not beautiful enough…

We are ALL Enough, we’re Actually far more than Enough.

Its Time We All Believed That…

I am On  a Mission – For Every women (men too)  To realise they are amazing

Come join me and lets help everyone know they are enough – share this blog, 

Shout it from the rooftops !!!

Helen

Come Be The Best Version of Yourself You Can Be

… I am Enough

KNOW You Are Enough….

I BELIEVE In You…

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