My Stories

Do not judge a book by its cover.. this was a very awkward day


I know I know its been a Long long time…. 
So much has been happening, I wouldn’t know where to start, however Ill start with this…

I share this in the group today and Julia said she looks forward to hearing the whole story….

So here it is…

When my marriage broke down, I connected with someone, who wow, blew me away on our first communication. He seemed to be one of those ‘nights in shining armour’

We had met at school, and re connected on the internet some 30 years later. I’d had a crush on this guy when I was 15 and I thought it was unreciprocated, however he had liked me, just typical man had not done anything about it. 

So after connecting first via the internet, on my next trip back to the UK, we connected in real life and everything ‘seemed’ wonderful….

We had a long distance relationship for 3 years and he would promise to move to NZ from the UK

However, he broke my heart,  as they do. However this is not what this story is about. 

So we split, he moved on with someone else very quickly and that as they say is that.

During the 3 years, we were together, I had glimpses of the less than perfect human being he was. The flair ups of his temper, yet as we do, I ignored all the red flags .He was and I would call him ‘Jekyll and Hyde’ he could be so lovely and then so nasty.

After we broke up, We kept in touch and remained friends. He even picked me up from the airport when I returned to the UK. There was nothing between us, however there was ‘something’ we once again had a connection.

He invited me down to stay with him 5 hours away from where I was in S Wales.

Now this is where it gets interesting..

I finally decided to take the plunge and drive down to see him about 3 months after I’d first arrived back in the UK

On my journey down South, hes in touch with me by texting, asking me to hurry as we’re going out once I arrive.  The last thing I want to do after a 5 hour journey is go out… however, I seem to have no choice in the matter….

Fast forward – I arrive, have a quick cup of tea and he bundles me in the car. As we’re driving I ask more questions about where we are going..

Turns out, we’re meeting a lady friend of his – on further questions – its his ex girlfriend!!…WTF!!

This makes me feel a tad uneasy I’ve just driven 5 miles to spend time with a friend and our first night we’re off to catch up with ANOTHer ex girlfriend (not forgetting Im also an ex GF)

We arrive at the ladies house.  She seems very nice however ,not at all what I expected.  She’s much older than us.  As the evening progresses it becomes obvious to me, that whilst they are ex’s, there is still something between them and I feel like the third wheel… (if that doesn’t translate for you, its like being the third person on a date)

The whole evening, I felt like an outsider… this is NOT what I had imagined…

The icing on the cake was when I returned from the ladies loos, during our dinner (yes all 3 of us, how cute! not!! ) and they were holding hands on the table…. I just wanted the ground to swallow me up.

The interesting thing was ,I really liked this woman, we had a lot in common.

Finally the evening came to a close, we dropped his ex off and proceeded to drive back to his house .A row developed, i was in tears, he was shouting at me, accusing me of being jealous etc.. (nice)…It was horrendous. I don’t remember ever being treated so badly before in my life.

The atmosphere changed between us. Any connection we had was gone.

The next morning, we had planned a drive around Dartmoor close to where he lived. This is where that photo was taken. It was a surreal experience driving with someone you had previously been so in love with and now we were like strangers. So awkward, who was this man? it wasn’t a nice day at all.

This man was someone who had once seen me across the road, opened car doors for me, in short been everything I thought I wanted. Now he was cold, walking ahead of me…. my mind was made up.

The next day, as I came downstairs to find him looking at a map planning our day trip. I braced myself. I had no qualms about my choice, I wanted to get out of this house as soon as I could

“Hey’ I said calmly and politely, though my heart was nearly leaping out of my chest. ‘Look, I’ve taken enough of your time, Im going to continue my travels on my own from here on’ ‘thanks its been great’ I said, through gritted teeth when I really wanted to strangle him.

I don’t remember his response. Other than him reminding me, of the man I used to know, by going to the shop and getting me some snacks for my journey, there wasn’t much else to say.

How dare he treat me the way he had over the past 24 hours. I could do this journey without him. There was no way I was going to spend another minute with this person who thought it was Ok to be so cold, rude, heartless to me. I deserved better and I was GIVING MYSELF better.

I had a fantastic time on my solo adventures . I got lost, lost signal…. had an absolute blast…

Showed myself what I WAS capable of and how to value myself enough to walk away.

We’ve never been in touch since, its about 6 years. The fact that hes never reached out to apologise for his behaviour says even more about him.

Its So important that we realise how valuable we are. How Special we are.

I watched ‘Maid’ recently on Netflix and there was more than a little bit of this man in her boyfriend. The temper and blaming me for his bad behaviour. Remember Love yourself enough to walk away from anyone who doesn’t treat you the way you deserve.

If you’d like to know more about me and what I do, please drop me a line. I’d be happy to have a chat and see how I can help you

Helen

BeDeliciouslyFree

LetsTalkUnconditionalLove

My Stories


Forest.

Even a child knows how valuable the forest is. The fresh, breathtaking smell of trees. Echoing birds flying above that dense magnitude. A stable climate, a sustainable diverse life and a source of culture. Yet, forests and other ecosystems hang in the balance, threatened to become croplands, pasture, and plantations.

Forest.

Even a child knows how valuable the forest is. The fresh, breathtaking smell of trees. Echoing birds flying above that dense magnitude. A stable climate, a sustainable diverse life and a source of culture. Yet, forests and other ecosystems hang in the balance, threatened to become croplands, pasture, and plantations.

This came up on my memories and I had to share again…
How do you Get Through it? How do you find peace?


I don’t often share posts like this… however, knowing the Importance of Sharing your story….

and Happy Endings, I wanted to share mine…

The phrase ‘everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about’ is never more true than with this subject…. Depression/Mental Illness is ‘one’ of those subjects that gets ‘swept under the carpet’… Like Sex and money, No One wants to talk about it – its too ‘awkward’…’What does One say? nothing so lets not talk about….
… however, when you are ‘brave enough’ to mention it you realise just how many people struggle with it.
… ‘suffer with it’ if you prefer that…


I have suffered depression, several times in my life – mine has been called ‘reactive’… ie I ‘react’ to situations –
The first time I suffered ‘depression’ was when at 21 my boyfriend finished with me I didn’t ‘react’ well….. I remember being ‘threatened’ with Psychiatrists – in an effort to ‘shake me up….
…I do remember going to the doctors and being given a ‘large’ bottle of anti-depressants… scary enough for me to scare the Bejuzus of out me I put my bottle away in a drawer…and got myself out of it…

… ‘I suffered again’ – when my marriage broke up… took them for as little time as I could… I hated the side effects both going on them and coming off…. Then several years ago when my fur baby (dog) passed away, I can’t remember a time when I felt so low
…. she was Everything to me (aside from my human babies) – it hit me again… whilst I tried ‘everything’, nothing seemed to work…

In desperation – I went to the doctors… absolutely Loathed to take anything but knowing ‘something had to change…. I took the tablets for 12 hours…and Hated every minute … they say ‘you feel worse before it gets better’… I was WORSE in that 12 hours than I was before… I reached out to friends (a scary number of friends) told me ‘yes Im on them too, have been for years’… they tried to reassure me ‘keep taking them, it gets better’….

I could not get myself out of bed… my anxiety was ALOT worse… I was Scared… I have honestly never felt as bad…. I spoke to My Gp – who, like my friends said ‘It can take up to a few weeks to start to feel better’… that was it – I stopped taking them… and decided there and then go Take Over My Own Mind….

I did it – with Gratitude, Excercise (Bikram Yoga) and Making myself go out…
Im not saying this is right for everyone – but it certainly helped me…

It scares me that Doctors tell people ‘you will need these for the rest of your life’ Who says? From My perspective – Life isn’t Easy – Sh*t happens, however We grow stronger and wiser by Learning How to cope when the sh*t hits the fan. I would Hope that I will never ever need to go back on them… It was a Seriously scary time…
This was inspired by this article… A few years ago – a friend reached out to me and introduced me to her friend – who was struggling with depression … I tried to help her, talk to her.. suggesting the same things that had helped me… I could tell by her response to me – that she wasn’t open… She was shutting people out – Not really wanting help.. She had lost someone very close to her when she was young and had never recovered.. Sadly, Just like the lady in this article.. a year or so later, this lady walked into the Sea…

Its so sad when someone feels so lost, so cut from everyone – that they take their own Life.. I know quite a few people who have lost someone in this way – I can’t imagine what its like… But know its not your fault – that person was in their own ‘world’.. you could not have done anything

… Please Know that… and I do honestly believe as I do with everyone who passes, when they have passed, they are happy and at peace… they only place they can find Peace

Ps : if you do suffer, Please reach out to someone – and check out this website, set up by the amazing John Kirwan, former All Black – I’ve been told by a friend who has suffered all his life – that is one of the best hes seen.

with Love Helen

www.BeDeliciouslyFree.com

Want to work with me, have a new or existing business, you’d LOVE support with? DM me or find out more here

http://bit.ly/HowCanYouHelpMe

My Stories

What an 80s song and Paddington Bear have in common

Last week I shared a personal story about how I attracted a bad relationship..and how I put up with it… remember?

‘They will be around when you’re long gone’.. OUCH !!

Well just a few days later – I was listening to the Radio – something I don’t very often…. I was listening to Radio 2.. which is a great station for ‘reminicing’… and who came on..

Lionel Richie… Penny Lover….

OMG – I just had to Share this with you – because this story is the total Opposite of the ‘other story’…

This was some years earlier…

I had gotten out of my comfort zone and gone on holiday on my own – yes a very naive 20 something year old – who went on an 80-30’s holiday – What was I thinking ???

do you know what happens on 80-30 holiday??? well thats for another blog/note…

I was horrified by the behaviour that went on – ROFL.. I was not your ‘average’ 20 something year old.

Anyway, I saw this guy – tall dark and handsome (yes I obviously have a thing for these types) however this one was Very different…..

Long story short

Me and this guy got together – he would watch me by the pool.. He was with a gang of ‘mates’… however he was ‘different’.. Whatever they were eating or drinking – he would offer me…

At the end of the holiday – we got together…

Once again – he lived in a different part of the world so I would travel up to his part of the world.. and occasionally he would come down…

He would meet me at Paddington station – from what i remember – he would have come along with one of his friends to pick me up = and I do remember, feeling amazing and also a little embarassed because he would just say ‘isn’t she gorgeous’…and generally rave on about me…. as we drove to his house…

He did this, the whole of the relationship – would just tell me how lovely I was…wow what a boost…

He also gave me Lionel Richie’s Album..with All of its Love Songs on there…

OMG – I was in heaven…

And One of the best of all – because we would always meet up At Paddington – he gave me a Paddington Bear – yes the 3 foot variety… which I still have to this day – some 20 years later…

Whats the lesson here? Remember the good relationships, what did you Love about that relationship.

Write a list down to the Universe

This is what I want in my ideal man/woman –

Feel the feelings you felt, how that relationship made you feel…
See his/her smile when you are with them.

Feel the touch of their skin on yours….

Get into that Happy Place….

Happy Manfiesting

Helen x

My Stories

When did you last write a love letter?

How are your relationships?

We need to have better relationships with Everyone.

…Ourselves.
Our friends/family
…Money…



The Better our relationship with OURSELVES, the better our relationship will be with Everything else in our life.

When did you last write a love letter to Yourself?

Telling yourself how proud you are of your achievement, how much you love yourself? How can you expect anyone else to love you if you don’t love yourself?

When did you last do Mirror work?

Look at yourself in the eye and tell yourself

‘I Love you, Im so proud of you, I forgive you’.. “I love your eyes, I love your nose’….

It took me ‘years’ to be able to do this without laughing without crying.. Now I can do it and laugh with happiness, because at last I have made peace with my self.

Many years ago, I applied to do modelling (hilarious now, I would HATE to be a model).. because someone I worked with, was modelling. I got the response

‘your face has too much character’

…WTF does that mean? I thought. Walking away very offended.

Years later, whilst at work, someone came up to me and said

‘Oh I love that face, so much character’…

…WTF again !! I thought? What is it with my face and its character…

Now at last I LOVE my face. No its far from perfect, but it MY Face and I love it…

I love my Silver hair

My pierced nose (not everyone does, but thats OK I DO 🙂

What do You love about yourself?

Getting writing those letters..

Helen

Come and join our tribe, remember to answer the questions first

My Stories

Several years ago, I discovered that a ‘friend’s’ (yes I use the term lightly now) man was playing around.

Im someone who is passionate about people. Passionate about people I care about. I Love people.. I guess I’ve been hurt and betrayed in my life, I don’t like to see anyone else go through what I went through.

It wasn’t a hard decision for me to make. Sure I made some mistakes in the way I handled it, however I wouldn’t change what I did.

In short, I told my friend (others knew but chose not to say anything) and the mistake I made, I told her who had told me. Of course as they say ‘The messenger always gets shot’… I was metaphorically shot.

Unfortunately the person who told me, was not impressed that I’d bought their name into it. Its not easy to tell anyone their man or woman is cheating and ‘How do you Know’ ‘Who Told you’ Is Always going to come up… however, I knew enough to KNOW it was true.. So I did what I would want done to me…

My friend, didn’t thank me, in fact, she ghosted me along with a load of ‘other’ friends and I became ‘persona non grata, an unacceptable or unwelcome person.

I noticed, my social life went quiet. This was just One bunch of friends of mine, however they were such a sociable bunch, my exclusion was very noticeable. I started to see photos of my ‘friends’ including one friend I thought was a ‘bestie’ out and about on FB without me. I was gutted. You know that feeling of hurt, sick to the stomach, your heart pounding. WTF was going on here?

I was even more hurt as the ‘friend’ I thought I was doing a favour for, had been a friend of mine from years ago. She had treated me badly years ago and I’d forgotten and forgiven and let her into my life and even introduced her to my friends. She was now the “In girl’ with my ‘friends’ and I was out ‘out girl’… I felt absolutely gutted, fuming, hurt beyond. So much for ‘friends’

I messaged a girl who had been what ‘I thought’ a ‘bestie’ for the last 10 years. She responded that she thought we ‘needed some space’. Space? I questioned? ‘Yeah’ she responded ‘I’ve been trying to get you for ten years’… ‘Trying to get me???!!!’

The words reverberated in my head and my heart ‘TRYING TO GET ME’.. WTF.. again I thought. My response was almost immediate ‘Then stop trying’ I said and cut her out of my life. As in unfriended her on FB!! along with all her ‘friends’ who had like lemins, followed her and hadn’t bothered with me either..

Incidently, I’d love to hear what you would have? Have you told a friend that their man/woman was messing around, or are you someone who would ‘keep out of it’…

It was a lonely time for a while after this. However I loved myself, however challenging that was, when friends ‘don’t get you’… I knew I didn’t ‘need or want’ friends who ‘didn’t get me’…

I really do believe Everything happens for a reason, and as if to proof the point, The Universe showed me, I did the right thing, as in the subsequent years, this ‘friend’ did other things, that in my book of ‘girl code’ you just didn’t do to people who were or ‘used to be ‘ friends, like get cosy with my ex.

Why am I sharing all this with you? Not to share my sob story no. It was to be one of the best/worst things that would happen to me.

After this happened, it pushed me even more outside my comfort zone..

Thats what we need, to be pushed out of our comfort zone… to grow, to realise ‘Hey I can do this’…

You see over the years, I’d done plenty out of my comfort zone.
…Moving to New Zealand on a whim.
Moving out of my Kiwi Bf’s house when we split and setting up with strangers in a strange country.
…Travelling alone…

However, even having done all that, still going out alone was a tad scary. However once I started, it was So exhilarating!! Going to the movies alone. Whilst 20 years ago, I may have felt like ‘Nigel No Mates‘ I felt the opposite.

I felt ‘My My god, here I am on my own going to see a movie/getting a drink/having lunch and I feel so good that I CAN and WILL do this’…

That was the beginning of me decided what I would and wouldn’t put up with.

You see in the past i’d put up with boyfriends telling me that ‘My friends will be around when you’re long gone’.. OMG and I stayed with that guy for a while after that.

I’d put up with boyfriends hurrying me out of the house the next morning, because they didn’t want their grown up kids to see me. They didnt’ see me as a long term relationship, they enjoyed the sex however. WTF…

I’ve come so far from the girl in the photo below, who wouldn’t say Boo to a ghost. Who was so timid and shy and would NEVER speak up for herself.

I have grown from strength to strength since being young and since this episode. Every thing we go through or GROW through, makes us stronger, wiser and have more belief in ourselves.

I CAN DO this..

I’d love to hear from you…

Helen
BeDeliciouslyFree

LetsTalkUnconditionalLove


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My Stories

What does BeDeliciouslyFree mean to you?

I came up with this name, for two reasons;

DKNY BeDelicious, a perfume I discovered a long time ago.

So long in fact that at xmas, my son sent me some and because I haven’t had it for a while, on thanking him for sending it to me, he told me ‘I remember you wearing it when I was young’ OMG, hes 24 now!.

Secondly, I don’t know about you, but i LOVE freedom and the two go hand in hand for me. When I smell DKNY BeDelicious, I go somewhere. (when you can, find some and smell it, I’d love to know what you get from it)

Recently I did a Mini Masterclass series, on ‘Lets Talk Unconditional Love”…. how did that name come about?

Several years ago, I lost my fur baby, who meant so much to me. I was truly devastated. I know now, that she had helped me through everything and when she went, everything I’d ever lost came up. A coach at the time asked me what I most missed about her ‘the Unconditional Love’ I said within a split second
‘then give that to yourself’…Oh what a revelation…

Don’t we ALL need to do that, we are so often looking for love AND giving love in ALL the wrong places.

So welcome to BeDeliciouslyFree and Lets Talk Unconditional Love.. I share and my coaching is based on my own life.

From a very shy young girl, the youngest of 3 girls who never felt good enough. I saw ‘success’ as getting Great exam results O levels and A Levels (something I didn’t achieve) because thats what my sisters got and I watched them in awe.

Then as I immersed more and more in my own growth.

Like you, i’ve been through so much;

Bullying, Losing a close relative, (we were estranged at the time)

I’ve lost friends, I thought were best friends “I’ve tried for 10 years to get you’… can you imagine how much that hurt.

I had told this friends Everything, my darkest deepest secrets. However losing her and her ‘followers’ was one of the best things that ever happened to me. It made me push myself out of my comfort zone.

I’ve been through things that devastated me, and picked myself up and got on with life again. We have No Choice..

Having said all this, its horrible being bullied, not believing you’re not good enough.

Try so hard to ‘fit in’ with others, when you know deep down, ‘Im not a bit like them, I just want to be accepted’..

Thats just what I did !! I started to Accept me for me…

So Today, I’d love you to share with ALL of us, what you’ve noticed about you, that You Love. How have you changed over the years?

This is Me about 12, looking ALOT younger (blessed now lol ) I was so shy, lacking confidence etc.. How far I’ve come 🙂 What about you?

With Love always

Helen

BeDeliciouslyfree

Lets talk Unconditional Love

My Stories

You really couldn’t make this stuff up…

So when Im not coaching, I put my Caring hat on and Im an essential worker…in the community, so I drive around going to people’s houses, with all the masks, aprons, gloves etc.. you get this gist. … yesterday, NY’s Eve, I got up for work at 6am and went out to the car.. … it was freezing. All my windows frozen.  I however, like to have some fresh air, Yes in ALL weathers.  I tried and tried to open my car window as I drove around.

I gave up and after a couple of calls, went to get a coffee…. as I walked away from the car, I heard this Almighty crash. I looked at the car, couldn’t see anything… … and then I saw, my drivers window had disappeared completely…

OMG, I thought  ‘Where’s the  glass?”… then when I tried the door, I could tell it was in the door, it was very heavy. I got my coffee and got back in the car.. freezing as I drive lol.. After my next call, an hour or so later, I came out to my car.. thinking my eyes were deceiving me. Now the passenger window was also gone !!! 

I was in shock. WTF….

I did have a word with the Universe at this stage, as whilst 30 years ago I had an soft top car, I have been thinking ‘mmm I’d quite like another one’.. however not in this Frigging Freezing weather !! 

Anyway – long story short, I went to my garage, who can’t fix it right now, however they did give me some tape and plastic to cover BOTH windows until they can fix it…

Why am I telling you this??

Because today is New Years day, its Also Fun Friday in my tribe.. One thing I have learnt in life, is To LAUGH both at myself and at life..

Life will hand you a sh*t sandwich every so often, however we just Have to get on with it. Attitude will get you everywhere..

its a stance I’ve adopted for years..
 When Friends let me down (Or so I thought were friends)
…When I’ve heard devastating news, that broke my heartWhen I’ve been torn between living in NZ and the UK

the list goes on…

Can you relate?

Did you fill out the survey yet

Want help with your attitude/goals/life?

Then hit reply and drop me a line and lets catch up.

Make 2021 Your Year !! 

Happy New Year 
Helen Lets Talk Unconditional
LoveBeDeliciouslyFree 

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My Stories

Its No One Else’s Job to Love/Like You, thats Your Job, Byrone Katie..

I shared this in my tribe, I thought I would share with you too.

… As I stared at my computer, my eyes began to sting… there was not much more of this I could take.

…13 years ago, Just over a year ago, one of my sisters had suddenly passed away.

I was in New Zealand, she had been in the UK. For various reasons, we (my two kids and myself) decided not to go back to the UK immediately, instead we would go for xmas)

…Lots of this time is a blur, understandably I was in a lot of shock. I do remember 6 weeks after hearing about my sister, my job was disestablished. This was to be my Annus horribilus, just like the Queen.

Fast forward a few months. We had been back to the UK, and returned to NZ.

… I was given a new job, that I was not in the right mindset for. It was a very fast, busy job. Way too much for me to handle in my vulnerable state.

… I was heartbroken. I had developed some health issues, both connected to my sister’s passing and due to the stress. I was going to the hospital every few months.

Then, the inconceivable happened. The powers that be in my new job, started to bully me. Yes.. to add weight onto everything else.

…Every few months, they; the HR manager (who told me quite honestly, that she did not like me, she’d looked at my file for the year previously, did not like what she saw, and was going to be ‘watching me very closely’) and my two line managers, would call me into a room and find fault with my work..

…Ill never forget one particular meeting

‘When anyone out there, asks you to do something, you will jump and you will ask ‘how high’ and you will do whatever they need of you’..

… I was so broken at this stage.

…I would just sit there, incredulous that the two male managers would sit there and be witness to this ‘bullying’ .

This went on from February to December. The year after my sister passed.

…I lost weight, I couldn’t eat, I would cry myself to sleep and wake up with panic attacks.

Could life get any worse?

…So there I was looking at my computer, the email that had just come in. It wasn’t ‘official’ but I could tell by what it said, they were starting disciplinary action against me.

…I got up, looked at my two colleagues, who had been there as support all through this and walked out of the building, where I cried my eyes out. They followed me outside.

…Fast forward a few weeks…. the worm began to turn.

The email has given me a date and time that they wanted to meet with me to go over the last year.

Instead.. I gathered all the emotional strength that had depleted me over the last year, and put a response together.

…how badly, they had treated me.
.. how the two managers had sat there and watched
… after everything I had been through, they thought it was appropriate to treat me like this

…This was appalling

I remember standing up in that meeting, shaking and reading this out to them.

…I told them, I could take a Personal Grievance, or they could pay me what I was asking for.

i hoped no body ever went through this again (but of course this happens all the time)

I trembled as I read it, the tears weren’t far from my eyes, I don’t remember if I cried but I do remember reading it out and then leaving the room.

Phew,
OMG, OMG, OMG
I could dance on the ceiling!!

.. A whole weight was off my shoulders. I felt soo good. I didn’t care what happened after that .I had told them.

I was OUTA there !!

This was to be the start of a new life for me.

…The next few days, were nerve racking, waiting for their response, but I also knew, that whatever happened, I was out of there in the next few days.

…They agreed to pay me what I asked for and I was to leave in a matter of days.

I wish on reflection, I’d had the ‘balls’ to take them to court. I read many years later, of a case very similar to mine, in NZ again, where the girl took them to court and won.

Some days later, my manager called me into his office. . He was all sweetness and light, and in reality, I wanted to hit him.

Seriously I did.

He was a good looking guy, who thought he was the bee’s knee’s and yet he’d sat there month after month whilst ‘Betty’ (not her real name) had bullied me and he’d said nothing.

People like this are as bad as the bully in my book.

“Helen, we’d love to throw you a leaving do’… he smiled ‘WTF’ I silently thought. I was just amazed

So a few days later, a ‘nice’ morning tea was put on for me.. and everyone stood around whilst I was given a nice present and farewelled. It was excuse the french ‘F…ridiculous’…

I walked away from that job. A different person. It was one of the worst/best things to happen to me.

Thats exactly what challenges are, lessons to learn from.

I had been into personal development before that, but this was to propel me Even more into it. I wanted to prevent as many other women going through this as I could.

Thats why I started BeDeliciouslyFree and now Empowering You to BeDeliciouslyFree.

DKNY BeDelicious was a perfume I used to wear and loved it and Free is how I feel, Im still a WIP, but Im free from other people’s judgement of me.

Over the years, I”ve gone my natural ‘white’, I’ve shaved the side of my head. I’ve had my nose pierced. I’ve received disparaging comments about it All.

F O!!..
Jog On…
..I don’t care,
…its MY hair,
…its My Body…
…Ill do what I want,
…thank you for your opinion.
I LOVE me !!

I help other women to be the same. Be Yourself and Sod what anyone else thinks of you. As long as you’re not hurting anyone else. As long as You’re kind, considerable, compassionate.
Be You,
Be The best Version of You.

I realised the other day I have experienced bullying several times in my life.

In my personal life, at school. In other jobs.

People ask me ‘how come you’re so strong?” I guess its because of the sh*t I’ve been through.
We have a CHOICE, to RISE Up and take control or to let it bury us, and become afraid and fearful.

I’ve also discovered, not everyone likes me, because Im strong and Assertive. Im not perfect, I know that. No one is, but Im on the journey of becoming the best version of me.

I used to be aggressive and shout etc. I followed my father.

Then I learnt from Tony Robbins. Theres more than one way to skin a cat (how I hate that expression)

So I’m now Assertive.
Calm and Assertive and Passionate and again not everyone like that. Thats OK, I like that.

I have boundaries. Getting out of my comfort zone, is not always easy but so much easier than it used to be. I speak up, when others won’t.

Its not anyone else’s job to Like you, thats your Job!
Byrone Katie.

If any of this resonates with you, and you want my help.Pm me and lets talk.

xx

My Stories

Yes, thats me in all my glory, about 12 maybe, but looking more like 8, story of my life !! 

… I kinda like it now… 

a while ago, my son said

‘Oh yes you don’t look anywhere near your age, maybe 40’s,, ah maybe 48 ah maybe early 50’s.. and in my true style, I laughed and said ‘Oh thank you’…

Why am I showing you that photo…

… because it takes me back. like this drama i’ve just watched.

Normal People.. OMG it was incredible…

Abuse, verbal and physical, bullying, feeling ugly and flat chested..

You name it.. I’ve been there..

Watching, the mother say nothing as the brother bullys the daughter OMG, how could she not say anything

… once again I’ve been there, I’ve been bullied and saw people just watch and not speak up.. because they needed to be liked.  or were afraid..

The boyfriend making the girlfriend a Secret, and actually ‘ghosting’ the girlfriend at school..

Been there too.  I had a boyfriend, who was on the OUTSIDE ‘gorgeous’ but a Wet Towel of. man.  He was tall and handsome. We were INSTANTLY attracted to each other, the chemistry was amazing. However he didn’t want anyone knowing we were seeing each other and then one night I stayed at his place . he hurried me out the door before his Adult sons came back…

Yes, I finally realised my worth and walked away.. However, it took me ‘years’ to get over him..

This is partly Why I do what I do, 

I EMPOWER you to be The Amazing, Powerful Beautiful woman that you are. Because You are.

I’ve been where you are. I’ve walked away from relationships… when it would have been so much easier to stay.

I”ve stayed in relationships Because I wanted to be with SOMEONE.. Everyone else was in Happy Ever After.. (in truth I had NO Idea what their relationship was like)… so I hung on, and was shamed, and treated so badly..

I remember one guy.. once again tall dark and handsome.. but such an A*se hole  really… 

short version.

We had broken up but he fancied sex… there were other people in the room (asleep).. I was very submissive, late 20’s very attractive but didn’t see it.

Didn’t feel good enough.
Amazed that this man had fancied me… !!

So Yes.. I have been there.. and this drama bought it all up for me.. In a good way.. showing me how far I’ve come…

I did a live yesterday on this very thing. Something I feel so strongly about..

…Stand Up
… Speak Up.. for others if they can’t.
… Be that Person who will do whatever you can, whenever you can.

Just think, if that were your son, or daughter wouldn’t you want some one to speak up for them?

So as you see i have come FULL circle, thats why I KNOW I can help you..

Want to chat? want to know how we can work together..

Hit reply and say “Yes Helen, I need some of your coaching’ or click here and book a brief call where we can talk and connect.

hit reply and tell me how you can relate, a story you’ve experienced. 

talk soon 

Helen 
www.BeDeliciouslyFree.
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bedeliciouslyfree/

My Stories

What Losing friends Can do For You..

Hey My Gorgeous reader

We are out of our comfort zones right now… 

i know.. it hurts, its hard BUT Its Good for US…

… its teaching us to GROW.. its teaching us to EXPAND ourselves…

For those of you who don’t know me very well, I want to share something with you.

Sometimes, in fact, very often out of great challenges, hardships, comes the best rewards…

Some of you may have heard this story..

Years ago, I was pushed RIGHT out of my comfort zone..

it involved Speaking Up about something I believed in..

In short, I told a friend her man was playing around….

the mistake I made.. was telling her WHO told me.. 

because that meant even more sh*t hit the fan… and I hadn’t intended to hurt that friend at all. I hadn’t intended to hurt ANYONE. I was just telling the truth, standing true to what I believed in !

no I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes,

but

a friend had told me she’d seen him enough times, for me to know it was true.

I know Not everyone would speak up.

…I’ve heard several stories of people finding out and Not telling their friend.

This goes totally against my integrity. 

….I would Hate it if a friend KNEW and didn’t tell me..

So..I told my friend as lovingly as I could..

OMG the shit hit the fan. The messenger got shot (aka Me)

Everyone including the ‘frend’ I’d told, Shut me out.. I was Persona Non Grata.

My social calendar (with this group of friends) went very quiet..

I started to see them on Facebook out without me.. I was gutted.

My heart fell to the pit of my stomach. I was devastated.. 

One particular friend, who I THOUGHT was a really good friend told me

‘Im putting some distance between us’ and ;

I’ve been trying to get you for a long time..

Gulp… this was someone I had confided in, trusted..

I Learnt a HUGE lesson.

Who My Real friends were.

 I let that friend go..

If someone doesn’t get you after a long friendship, let them go…

I had confided in that friend, they knew my deepest darkest secrets, they knew things, others didn’t and it was a real kick in the teeth but I knew it was the best thing for me.

I was Right out of my Comfort zone

There was a lot of other sh*t going on in my life so this was truly an Anus Horribilus (as the queen had some time ago)

However, it was one of the Best things to Happen to me..

...It Made me Get Out of my comfort zone
…Go out on my own – Woo Hoo Very empowering
…Make More Friends
…Value Myself More
…Be more discerning about who I was allowing in my lif
e

Be TRUE to myself…

I had been a People Pleaser… 

you know, fitting in, doing all the ‘right things’.. in other words, Not being my Authentic self

we’re ALL guilty of this…

Don’t get me wrong, this was HUGE, this was Terrifying, I felt ALONE

But I got through this.. and Im better and stronger for it 

I’d Love to hear your thoughts on this, would you speak up or would you stay quiet..

So I know You and I can Get through this… 

Im here to help YOU

Did you see my live today?
Check it out and hit reply and tell me ‘Im interested’ Helen 

Always here for you 

Helen 
BeDeliciouslyFree

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